Are parents getting stupider, or is it just me? (No, it's not just me!)
As a school teacher I am amazed each year when I encounter parents who readily believe their child without even thinking to ask for the other side of the story.
Obviously they've never read Proverbs 18:17 -- "The first one to plead his cause seems right, until his neighbor comes and examines him."
Haven't these parents even heard the popular version of the proverb: "There are two sides to every story."?
This week I took an informal poll of 12 sixth graders. 10 of the 12 readily admit that they are "misleading" when dealing with their parents.
This "misleading" usually involves only telling part of the story. The other half of the story is missing! (Hello!)
My sixth graders seem to have more sense about themselves than some parents, especially than the parents who believe whatever their child tells them. That's not just naive, it's ridiculous!
Parents need to get all the facts. Then they may deny the facts, ignore the facts, or disbelieve the facts, but they're still the facts.
I like kids. I choose to work with them as an educator, but I have no delusions about their honesty and forth-rightness. Many of them will lie to save their skin. Many will readily throw truth under the bus if they think it will save their skin. Many will withhold incriminating information. Few are consistently and completely honest. (They mirror our society, unfortunately.)
So before you believe a kid, get the facts. Get both sides of the story. Do some cross-examination! (Don't be stupid!)
With each new school year I start off believing my students until certain ones teach me not to believe them. Some students are honest. Some are not. (Learn to tell the difference -- and check your facts. Get both sides of the story! Do your homework.)
As adults we need to be realistic about kids and help them learn honesty, responsibility, and character. It begins by modeling those behaviors for them. It continues as we take the time to get the whole story, especially the part that is not being told.
Kids want what is fair -- unless they are hiding something! They deserve fairness and justice, even if it means holding them accountable for their misdeeds and mis-truths.
If we consistently let kids lie to us, we teach them to become liars, and that's a bad idea.
C'mon people!
End of rant.
haha,I appreciated your comment, atleast I know someone is a fan! haha! and yes, parents are becoming more stupid, some of the kids that come into my store, sometimes I wanna just slap them myself!
ReplyDeleteIt's All Good hails from Florida, and she too sees a downward trend in parents. Note to readers: she's in her early 20's! Yikes! It's widespread and it's noticeable. ;-)
ReplyDeleteWhat are those white flowers in your rant? Not that it will make much difference to me, as I know better than to plant things that will not live in zone 4.
ReplyDeleteThe "two sides" applies to church too, unfortunately. I have a situation with a new family in the area who are doing a dance with us, and us with them.
Dennis,
ReplyDeleteI don't know the name of the vine-like plant that produces these flowers. The next time I venture over to the Arboretum I'll find out. They're just so huge I wanted to snap some shots to share.
On the "two sides" comment: getting the facts isn't always easy, just necessary.
Don
Parents who have to blame the teacher to save the 'delicate self-esteem' of the child have a special layer of hell all reserved for them...I know, I saw it in that Dante work somewhere...
ReplyDeleteA saying I like is, "I won't believe 50% of what your kids says happens at home, if you don't believe 50% of what they say happens at school." (I paraphrase)
Saphron,
ReplyDeleteI never read "Paradise Lost," now maybe I'll have to and look for that reference! ;-)
I do like the saying, but I usually stiffle the sarcasm in dealing with parents. Filters: gotta use 'em!
Don